Meeting with an accomplished man

Different people have different opinions or notions about what an accomplished man/woman or an accomplished life would be like. However, one notion shared by a wide group is that if one has done and achieved one could do and achieve, then he/she has fully lived the life. I met such an accomplished man today. I will limit my opinions and try to capture most of our conversations.

This gentleman, named Mokhtar Adb Razak, drives executive “limousine” (Toyota/Kia MUV cars). On request of the Park Royal hotel concierge, I agreed on taking a slightly expensive but good quality limousine instead of a regular taxi at a premium of 20 MYR (300 INR) and that was a very good decision.

Preamble

Mokhtar (M): Hello sir, how are you?

Kumar (K): I am fine, thank you.

M: So sir, where are you going?

K: Bintulu.

M: Flying by MAS?

K: Yes.

M: OK. Just need to make sure I send you to the right airport J.

K: OK.

M: You work in Bintulu?

K: Yes.

M: Which sector? Oil?

K: Yes.

M: Which company?

K: Shell.

M: Oh, that’s a very good company. I have seen many people working for the company for 20+ years. It must be a good company to work for, for the people are staying that long. (Sayan and I had a similar discussion yesterday on how sometimes people feel that the company isn’t good enough or fair enough at times, but if you talk outside, you realize you are working for one of the better employers, if not the best, in this region).

Traffic and Taxi business:

M: This morning, there was a terrible jam on the roads coming into the city.

K: Yeah? Actually last night was even more terrible. (Had a storm last night).

M: That was because some old trees fell and four cars were crushed under it.

K: Ohh, anyone got hurt?

M: Luckily no. But unlucky for them, the insurance doesn’t cover the acts of God. They only cover for manly acts of accident and negligence.

K: (Thinking about the driver’s intelligence…) Hmm.

K: So is this your own car or you rent it?

M: Rent.

K: How much do you pay per month?

M: 100 MYR per day.

K: And how is the business?

M: Survival. One cannot become rich as a taxi driver, but it is enough for survival. (I took these remarks as general, but found later that they had a solid foundation from this man’s life).

K: You have family? (This question is almost redundant for a man of M’s age in the East, but this is a poor practice of not assuming anything that I carry from my years in the West).

M: Yes, nine children.

(I was like Wow! I was inclined to immediately ask how many wives he has [in Malaysia, Muslims are allowed to have 4 wives], but thought it would be offensive, even if I add “If you don’t mind asking” bullshit in the beginning of the question … why would one ask a question if he/she thinks it might offend the other person? Then another question came whether Islam too, like Roman Catholics, has ideas that protection shouldn’t be used, but thought that that would be even more offensive. Anyway, this was a turning point in our conversation and it revealed how accomplished a taxi driver with Muslim tag and 9 children could be from within. BTW, there is a great book called as Taxi Driver Wisdom, which I came across in our Mission library in Chennai!)

Family and children

(After a lot of consideration…)

K: Wow, 9 children.

M: Actually I wanted 12, but God’s will was 9. 9 sounds a lot, but once they start going to school and college, it isn’t a lot. Now, there are only 4 left at home (Phew… only!).

K: In this age, people think hard for even having a 2^nd or 3^rd child (referring to the East, the West is further off!).

M: People are worried about children because they equate children with money (which is true in a sense), but I believe that things fall in place anyway (and it did if I see this man – a taxi driver by profession, 51 years old but looking 45, short but fit, a bit bald but still all black hairs, having 9 children and still lamenting about not having 3 more, and most of all carrying a smile and subtlety on his face that shows only the tip of his maturity iceberg).

K: You must have a lot of faith in God.

M: Yes, I do. I try to be a good Muslim.

(After some moments...)

M: Generally, money is tight twice a year. Once when the school begins – to get their clothing, books etc. And the second is during Hari Raya (Ramzan/Ramaadan). However, I am still surviving (with a very gentle smile). And tough times come and there are times when things are very relaxed too. These things come and go.

God and religion

M: Are you Muslim?

K: No, I am Hindu.

M: Oh, so you worship Hindu god?

K: Not really. I am born as a Hindu, but I don’t follow Hinduism in that way. I practice meditation – that is my way of God.

M: OK.

M: If you get an opportunity, you should try to read Koran. (This was said in very positive spirit of sharing something good and not in the converting spirit I have seen with some in the past.)

K: Actually, I have the fortune of having two of my best school friends as Muslims, of which I have very close association with one’s family as well. And then, I also found this nice book called as 365 readings from Islam. Actually I practice meditation, but I like knowing about other religions, what the founders said and how the religions have shaped through centuries.

M: Good, it widens your perspective.

K: (now in boasting mode) You know there is one thing given in the book which I like the most which most of my Muslim friends don’t know and most of them even deny it, as the book has been written by a Dutch man. But these western people are very methodical and I believe in what she said. So, I will ask you the same question – why is Friday a special day for Muslims?

M: You see in Islam, we have a concept of Jamaat (gathering). But before I gather with community, I must gather with my family, and before I gather with the family, I must gather with my wife, and before I gather with my wife, I must gather with myself! (sidetracked as he didn’t understand my question well, but very wise thoughts; later, he also told me something new – that the prophet recommends mating on Thursday night and Monday night to get well-balanced children – Thursday one of course in line with the above thought).

K: That is a very good thought, but my question is – why Friday? Why not Tuesday or Thursday?

M: In Islam and Bible, they say that God created Man in 6 or 7 days depending on reference. Starting with Sunday as first day, the man was completed in 6 days (he gave details that I wouldn’t go into).

K: OK, what you say is one opinion and something that no one has told me before. However, I will tell you what the book says. When Mohammed moved to Medina, he got the idea of doing prayer in-group. He first thought of Saturday, but decided on Friday because Jews are busy on Saturday because of the day of Sabbath, and he thought that by keeping it on Friday, it would also allow Jews who want to join to take part. It shows the openness and consideration of that great man.

M: OK, that may also be right.

(After some moments...)

M: You know I don’t see religion as a way of just following the rituals. I see our prayers as means to reconnect to our creator. That is why we have 5-times prayer of 10 minutes each – to purify our thoughts and to re connect.

[Interesting point – 365 readings on Islam says that when Mohammed first asked Abraham (called Ibrahim in Islam) on how many times we should pray in a day, he got 50 as the answer! Knowing how difficult it would be for people to follow, he requested this to be reduced to 5. How wise!]

K: Your thoughts are very modern and refined and I doubt how many Muslims think like you (in fact, for most people, this man would be called as a heretic; and to be further clear, this lack of openness and refinement is applicable to a big percentage of almost every religious and spiritual group).

M: You know I also don’t believe that Allah is God (whew!). Allah is Allah and God is God. If there is no man, there is no God. God creates man so that he can get recognition (said with a slightly mocking, yet decent laugh). In fact, I think that the God is in each one of us. He created us and what do we do? We can make cars, buildings and what not, but can I make a baby girl if I want to? No. All we do is derive pleasure out of it, but the work of God is done through the intercourse – we create children as God created us. Therefore, I think I am also Mohammed – the messenger of God, bringing creation into the world and continuing God’s existence.

(By this time, I had already started wondering if this man is greatly educated or what? He speaks good English, has bright ideas and sometimes uses very sophisticated and relevant words. However, further conversations revealed that his wisdom stems from experiences of his years, his search motive and his natural living.)

On conversations

M: Although it is not given in the Koran, the Prophet has once said that it is good to have conflicting conversations – truth will emerge out of the conflict, but it is required that both persons are honest and are searching for the truth.

(Thinking later, I thought it is perhaps also true for a married life; these days, people worry so much about the perfect partner and all that, but every couple fights, everyone has tough times in life and so on. However, honest duo in the couple would help each other learn the truth and relish the juice of life).

I don’t know where our conversation ended, but it did end when I reached airport. I felt lucky that I didn’t use the iPod I had taken out when I entered the car and that I followed my natural instinct of not doing anything (in fact the desire of doing a lot in life is most of the times a reflection of own insecurity or smallness).

I felt and still feel very happy – and the right words of the feeling would be that it was the happiness of meeting a pure hearted human being, who has not wasted his life and has rather evolved beautifully through it.

PS: There is an amazing book Meetings with Remarkable Men by G.I. Gurdjieff, which is far better than my blog, but this fact deserved mention only at the end.